To the beach forever

This past summer my boys were gone all summer long. I had the three of them together for a total of about five days. #1 worked in Manhattan and #2 worked at the New Jersey shore.

When they come home, I walked out to the pool one day and as I stood looking at all three of them playing water basketball. #2 was trying to dunk #1 and #3 was laughing. I stood watching them.

I thought about the fact that #1 was leaving for London and wouldn't be home again until Christmas, #2 was leaving for college and he would be home for Thanksgiving but I knew #3 would miss his brothers.

I thought about #1's trip to Eastern Europe, that he would be gone for four months and how much I would miss him, and my fears. What if something happened? I thought about him studying abroad in London, how he dreamed of this and talked about it for years. I thought about #2 and his dreams of college and all that he and I went through together his senior year and suddenly I was overcome with tears. #2 said,

"Mom, what's wrong?"

I knew if I said anything he wouldn't understand, so I just shook my head. But thoughts kept coming. I thought about Thanksgiving and the fact that #1 wouldn't be home this year. I thought about when I used to put a monster lego on my head and pretend I was Queen Mummy with my fake British accent and we'd pretend they were Princes. And tears rolled down my face.

#2 and #3 watched me from the pool and grew more concerned.

"What's wrong Mom?"

Finally I said,

"Nothing, I'm just so happy you're all here together."

#2 looked at me with total sarcasm in his face and said,

"Oh, I thought it was something real."

At that moment I wanted to send that kid back to the beach forever. Then I chuckled under my breath and knew that it was time for them to move on with their lives and right for just the three of us to be where we are. It is the circle of life.

Thank You for Being Here. It really means a lot to me that you take time out of your schedule to come by.